Excerpt from "Sex with Clergy and Veggie Burgers." CONTENTS of my Character

“Re-examine all you have been told…Dismiss what insults your Soul.”

-Walt Whitman

The Be @ Tit Tudes

Intro

I. Blessed are the Sabbath Observers - SDA’s put the Fun in Fundamentalist Christian Cult

II. Blessed are the Holy Heteros - God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve

Crazed SDAs

III. Blessed are the Virgins - Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?

IV. Blessed are the Vegetarians - Can’t catch Swine Flu eating ToFu

Raised SDAs

V. Blessed are the Tithers for they get to be Deciders

VI. Blessed are the Sober, Drug Free Health Nuts for they become All the Pretty Corpses

Praised SDAs

VII. Blessed are they who believe in GOD - no punchline…I got nothin’

Outro